My elder brother and I have never been close since young. The relationship I have with my sister only become closer when she started working and became more mature in her thinking and behaviour. It was then that we started to share responsibilities for our parents.
Being a boy and the only son in the family, my brother was spoiled rotten by my mum since young as my mum was the type of traditional woman who favours boys to girls. We grew up in the kind of home environment that as girls, we have to help out in all the housework but get no credit for it for being well-behaved and obedient. Even when we do well in school, we never get praised of. On the contrary, my brother did not have to lift a single finger to do things around the house. But when it comes to anything, my brother would get the priority. He would be at the top of my mum's mind in everything she does, even right till the time he got married and has his own family. When he has kids of his own, the love and concern my mum has for him was extended to his children in the way she loves and takes care of my nephews all these years.
Deep inside, of course we know our mum cares for us (my sis and I) a lot. It's probably just the way she shows her love and concern for us. It may not be the same explicit way as how she showed it towards my brother. Over the years, we just grew up getting used to it and living with it but still loving our good old parents the way they are.
You would probably think that my brother would grow up to be the most filial child among the 3 of us given the kind of special care and attention that was showered on him. On the contrary, he is not. In my view, he grew up to be a MCP and is one man that has no (or little) sense of responsibility towards to his family, work and life and no sense of gratitude and filial piety towards his parents who have given life to him, gone through so much to bring him up and provide for him to be what he is today.
My sister on the other hand was the more sensible one even though she was much younger than both of us. To be honest, she was the one who had influenced me to be more forgiving towards my parents for their past actions, to look at the good side of them and accept the shortcomings of their characters. This was especially so after I became a parent myself; a mother to my own children that I truly understand the love and pain of being a parent.
I know our family will never be the same again. If it has to get to this stage for my brother and sil to shoulder up the due responsibilities as parents and children, so be it. It's really sad....but life's not perfect.
